Have you ever had a great idea, started it, and then quit before you got very far because you couldn’t get it to work right? Or perhaps, you are constantly late turning in work tasks because it just takes too long to get it totally right.
I understand.
I have started books and blogs – then quit because they weren’t how I envisioned them. I have started home improvement projects and quit before I did more than move a few pieces of furniture. And I have started software applications and then stopped before I even got one working piece.
I quit because my initial efforts did not come anywhere close to what I had envisioned. I had this image of what excellence was, but I failed to even approach it. It seemed like it would be too hard to get there.
Because I doubted that I was capable of doing what I wanted, I quit.
I had that old saying in my head: “If you can’t do something right, don’t do it at all.” I used to tell myself
As a side-note – there are certainly appropriate times to quit. I quit sewing because I realized it didn’t bring me joy and it was preventing me from focusing on what really mattered.
But if you are like me, you probably have a tendency to quit because you cannot get something good enough, rather than because it is an appropriate time to quit.
Perfectionism prevents us from completing what matters.
Imagine a contractor who designs and builds houses
What if he drafted a house and then started placing footers, but stopped because one was a darker color than all the others? Imagine if he just shrugged and said, “it’s not good enough. I give up.” (in case you aren’t up on construction terms, the footers go underneath the foundation. Color is irrelevant.).
It’s really ridiculous to consider. But then – those of us with perfectionistic tendencies do the same thing all the time. We look at our efforts, notice some flaw that only we can see, and we stop, convinced any more work will be just pointless.
Now, I’m not saying we should do sloppy work and put it out in the world. To go back to the same example, if the contractor laid footers but they were too shallow or narrow and he went ahead with building the house anyway, the foundation would eventually fail and the entire building would become unstable.
So yes, quality absolutely matters. But we cannot allow our perfectionism to prevent us from getting stuff done.
So how can we get past our perfectionism?
Well, first, we accept that no one is perfect.
Not one of us.
Think about Facebook. It’s really an amazing piece of technology. Yet it has been freezing up in the browser lately. The company has been criticized for how it handles privacy issues. And the website is often used as a way to spread rumors and misinformation.
So it certainly isn’t perfect. But it is amazing, successful, and useful.
If Facebook can accept imperfection while producing something valuable to the whole world, then surely we can too. After all, most of us are worried about projects that only a small handful of people will even see.
But after we accept that no one is perfect, we still do not want to compromise our drive for excellence.
The right answer is to start taking much smaller bites.
For decades, software developers produced software as if they were building bridges. In fact, they called themselves “engineers”.
They had the pre-approved plans, with every detail drafted in. And then they built it all, following the plans to the letter. Then they went through quality control. They released it to the business user only after quality control declared it to be perfect.
You might think that sounds like the right approach. But it isn’t.
First, business requirements can change, sometimes very quickly. So by the time large software projects were complete, they didn’t meet the now-changed business requirements.
And second, software development is about people as much as it is about business requirements, and most people don’t think like engineers. When you ask a business user, “what do you need this tool to do,” they cannot answer you. They shrug, give a few details about their job, and really cannot imagine much more.
But once you hand the software to them, they start saying, “well, what if we did x?” Or “I really wish that widget were over there.” Or “Can I type this value into that field?”
They get all the good ideas after the project is already in their hands.
So software developers have learned a new way – iterations, or much smaller bites. They get whatever information they can from the user, program the smallest, useful piece, test it, and deliver it. Then they get feedback, improve that piece, add functionality, test, and deliver. And they iterate over and over and over again until one day the system has met all the business requirements plus most of the business users’ wishes.
So that is how I get past my need to make everything perfect.
I don’t tell myself to get over it. I tell myself to break it down into tiny bites, make one small thing as good as I can get it, then deliver that one small thing. Then I see what is broken, identify the gaps, and do it all over again.
Small bites are much less overwhelming.
It’s like this blog. I wasn’t sure about all the details and had no real strategy for getting it into the hands of readers. But I did have a good idea of the message.
I decided the main point was to write, to write often, and to write well. I figured I would tweak the rest as I went.
So I did. I went live and started writing. Then improved the images and the layout.
With every iteration, I do the best I know how, so I can be proud of it. But I also know it isn’t done yet. That has allowed me to hope that while it isn’t up to my standards TODAY, I could get it there eventually.
I just keep coming back to add the improvements that I need in order to become excellent.
These small iterations will work for anything.
Like romantic relationships. You connect from a brief conversation, then you get to know each other more deeply over coffee, and
Or like gardening. You might start in year one with a tiny garden plot and two tomato plants. Next year you could add peppers. And each year you add more until it reaches your ultimate vision.
This works on the job, too. Make a draft, have someone review it, make improvements, turn it in. Don’t get trapped in the idea of never letting anything leave your hand until it is perfect, because then you will never even get started.
That dream project you have?
Find the smallest possible deliverable. Find the smallest possible audience or customer. Then deliver to that audience. Take their feedback, go back, and make improvements. Then add in that new piece you want to do. And repeat until one day, this big beautiful thing you want to produce is finally done.
Don’t allow perfectionism be an excuse to quit.
Leave behind perfectionism, but keep your high standards.
And turn them into a tool that you use to continuously improve in the area that matters to you.